Archive for September, 2011

Opinion: Realism

Posted in HJ Journal on September 30, 2011 by HolyJunkie/Jakob

Call of Duty, Battlefield, Battle: LA, all those videos that replicate the same style as the previously-mentioned popular media. What do they all have in common, aside from shooting guns, explosions, and shit characterization?


No. No they are not. They have overly-detailed graphics that serve little to no purpose than to try to be immersive. Especially with that colour correction, where the colour is a little drowned out to give a grittier look.

Anyone who thinks that kind of colour correction is “realistic” is a f*cking moron, and needs to get his or her head unscrewed and tampered to understand things better.

Realism is what you actually see with your eyes. Do you see things as dull colours 24/7? Do your eyes automatically “crush the blacks” and “add funk” and “add sh*ttons of bloom to every light source”?

No, they don’t. Your eyes close up when hit by bright, direct light. You see colour very easily (unless you’re colourblind) and your eyes do not see dullness, unless the objects that are reflecting light into your eyes are dull to begin with.

Colour is everywhere. What “realistic” graphics do is drown out the colour on purpose, and therefore look real damn artificial.

It’s not “Realistic”, it’s “Stylistic”.

This so-called “Realism” is a style. A boring as hell style, but a style nonetheless. Those who don’t understand this fact are idiots.

That is not blind ranting, that is fact.

We’re done here.


PS. On extended consideration, a certain rule of the internet comes to mind: “The more you try, the more you will fail.”


Opinion: Music.

Posted in HJ Journal on September 27, 2011 by HolyJunkie/Jakob

Big surprise to the universe: I despise a number of different popular genres of music. Bring out the “What a poser! What an indie kid wannabe! What a dipstick! What a noob! Go back to your artsy films!”

Before I get to the point, I’ll point out that I’ve seen artsy films those pretentious film buffs claim to be “Teh best evar” but are really bland, uninteresting, and made a sloppy effort in portraying its theme and message. I won’t name any names.


Before I go down my list of “Stuff I hate,” I’ll go over why I like what I like.

Let’s take a good artist I like called “BT.” Here’s a link to one of his songs, called 1.618

You may notice that it’s basically a polar opposite to rap, or hiphop.

I personally hate rap because what they’re about is fast talking, with the actual melody taking a back seat. I get enough talking from work. I get enough talking in my school lectures. I get enough talking from the voices in my head. I just want a nice sound to clear my thoughts before I mentally burn out every day.

Isn’t that what art is all about? Make life not suck? Escapism? That’s why many people consider video games as “Art.”

Like film, books, images, video games, etc. Music is escapism. Escapism from the sh*ttiness that is real life. If not escapism, the proverbial spoonful of sugar that helps the medicine go down.

Let’s not beat around the bush. Our world and society ultimately sucks. We’ve gotten used to it, but some of us are slowly beginning to get the idea that the only way our world will stop sucking is if we make the effort to change it. That’s another subject entirely, however.

Music is escapism from the crap life, so why the hell would I, or anyone, want to listen to a nails-on-chalkboard loop with an annoying-sounding voice making rhymes about banging the bitches, or making the bling, smoking more pot than physically possible, or insulting other people.

Escapism is about feeling good about life, not listening to a black dude stereotype ranting about all this negative crap. I mean, sure one could feel good that their life isn’t as stupid and meaningless as the rapper’s, but I don’t think the general audience is smart enough to realise that.

I’d also prefer a more direct approach to feeling good. IE: music that’s soothing, that doesn’t send a clear message. Leave the thinking to your projects, work, and school. When it’s music time, I just want to relax. Even when I play music while working, I play something in the background that I barely notice.

I notice words. I hear people talking through insulated cinder block walls. I’ve got sensitive hearing. Every word I’ve ever heard sounds like noise. Disgusting, annoying noise. It’s medicine for my brain, to drown out the voices in my head.

Music, in my opinion, should be the spoonful of sugar that helps said medicine go down… I said that already… Mary Poppins was a fun movie.

Feeling good is not listening to some [insert racial slur here] bangin’ all da hoez.

Feeling good is mental serenity and peace.

You know… unless you’re a violent psychopath. In which case, might want to get that brain checked out for science. Just a suggestion.


Opinion: Warrior (2011)

Posted in HJ Journal on September 16, 2011 by HolyJunkie/Jakob

It’s my opinion that Warrior is among the same level of movie as last year’s The Fighter. The only differences are that Warrior is based around MMA fighting rather than Boxing, and Warrior is easily a superior film overall. There are a number of reasons why that is, topped by one dude’s name.

Tom Hardy. Holy crap on a stick, I didn’t recognize this dude from Inception. The attitude, expression, gait, were all completely different from the one and only other role I saw the actor in. Ye know, that gentlemanly English man I couldn’t help but like in a totally not gay way. In this movie, he’s a f*cking beast, and a monster. A guy who just tries to get through life by venting his pent-up frustration, acting as though he had no regrets.

Tom Hardy’s performance alone got me excited for The Dark Knight Rises for the first time… well, ever! Tommy Conlon was such a juggernaut on the screen and in the proverbial cage, that I honestly cannot wait to see him as Bane.

Oh yeah, and Joel Edgerton and Nick Nolte did pretty good jobs too… Pff… I’m just kidding. Nick Nolte did a damn excellent job. Joel Edgerton was also well-cast. I’m just going on about Tom Hardy because when I realised that he played that calm, playboy gentleman in Inception, I was all “wut?”

In all seriousness, this movie is really good. Easily a contender for an Oscar- much like The Fighter was. There were some problems I had with it, such as the camera-shake, which is sometimes coupled with extreme close-ups. It’s especially annoying when it cuts to a shot that’s looking through the cage.

This is a movie about MMA fighters. I want to see them beat the sh*t out of each other. I bet everyone who cares enough to watch the movie want to see the beatings. Actually, I’m going to make a list of people who would seriously enjoy this movie

  • UFC fans… Obviously.
  • People with siblings they love very much
  • Film buffs
  • Drama nuts
  • Fighting movie nuts
  • Fans of Rocky

Another thing I heard from a friend was “the montage with multiple screens was annoying.” He said the montage seemed a bit gimmicky, like it was trying too hard. I personally disagree.

The montage has gotten to the point where the only way to stand out among others is to be gimmicky. I personally liked the montage shown in Warrior. It showed all the sides of interest to the viewer at once, and wasted little time. Think about this for a sec: You have a montage that must last two minutes, and establish the following information in an evenly-paced fashion.

  • Tom Hardy’s training session
  • Joel Edgerton’s training session
  • News reels regarding the Big UFC thing.
  • Reaction shots of those who aren’t Tom Hardy or Joel Edgerton.

You can’t get all four of those things out of the way in a satisfactory fashion within two minutes. Either you flash it by too fast, or you do it one at a time, giving a measly thirty seconds to capture everything that needed to be told from the multiple points of view. The only option from that point was to use split-screen. That way, you spend the two minutes telling a minutes-worth of storytelling information in every point of view relevant to the story. When the amount of footage is put together, back-to-back, you’ve got a good ten minutes of dullness.

Condensing it was an excellent idea, in my honest opinion.

Now the fight scenes were great. REALLY great. Again, sometimes I had difficulty figuring out who hit who, or what happened at all, due to a coupling of camera-shake and extreme close-up during some of the fights- or even some of the dialogue scenes.

They’re ultimately small nitpicks, compared to the emotion the movie managed to inspire in my cold, dense shell of a former human being. Don’t miss out, human beings.


List: Things you can do instead of giving two sh*ts about the competition between Battlefield 3 and Modern Warfare 3

Posted in HJ Journal on September 6, 2011 by HolyJunkie/Jakob
  • Anything

Okay, that’s not true. In my personal opinion, it’s much easier to make a list of things that are comparatively more dull and mindless than the immature bitching between EA and Activision regarding their cookie-cutter war-based FPS games with boring dialogue thrown through the audio grinder to sound as sh*t as possible.. Bah…

Here’s the real list of things I’d do and HAVE done instead of give a crap about Battlefield 3 and Modern Warfare 3

  • Play DooM
  • Play Marathon
  • Play Megaman
  • Play any flash game on Newgrounds or whatever site that hosts flash games.
  • Look through the app store and console arcade stores for free demos, and play every single one you can find.
  • Play Halo (Hurr hurr. See what I did there? I could make my two cents about that, but that’s for another time)
  • Read a book
  • Watch a movie
  • Reorganize whatever collection you may have.
  • If you’ve already done it, reorganize said collection again.
  • Lounge in your back yard with an iced tea, or water, or whatever refreshing drink you may have.
  • Clubbing
  • Chilling out with friends
  • Explore your own city- namely look for some nice public parks.
  • Hang out in said public parks.
  • Examine a gravel driveway for interesting rocks.
  • Throw rocks at a wasp nest.
  • Run from the wasps.
  • Exercise
  • More exercise
  • More exercise
  • Arts and crafts in general
  • Draw
  • Work towards getting back into school, if you haven’t gotten back into school.
  • If you are in school, continue concentrating on that.
  • Watch My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. (That should be at the top, shouldn’t it?)
  • Set one of the MLP:FiM faces as your desktop background. Challenge yourself not to smile as you stare at it for ten minutes.
  • More exercise.
  • Watch Epic Meal Time. (Smart!)
  • Watch Freddie Wong.
  • Watch CorridorDigital.
  • Hang out with friends.
  • Sign up for the ACTUAL military. (I didn’t do that myself, on account of concentrating on school.)
  • Make a film
  • Make several films
  • Work for a living.
  • Play the W40k Space Marine Demo (According to a bud of mine, it’s really fun)
  • Get said game.
  • Watch trailers for Arkham City
  • Watch silly videos from Deus Ex: Human Revolution
  • Slam your dick in a door.
  • Play Call of Duty 4- the last good CoD game.
  • Masturbate.
  • Watch Fight Club.
  • Don’t talk about it.
  • Do not talk about it.
  • Walk to Tim Hortons and pick up a donut
  • Walk to the local ghetto mall and urinate into a fountain.

I’ll leave the comments for whoever wants to pitch in.